Settler of Catan is a board game I just learned how to play this spring. It's like a hybrid between "Risk" and "Monopoly", lots of dice rolling and strategizing, but in the end, when you win,it's always your own thinking,and when you lose, it seems to always be the dice's fault. Ever since I learned how to play it on-line, days and nights have been spent in front of my laptop, in front of the everchanging games of catan. I learned a lot, but always lose more than I win, but never stopped me from obessing with it. :), :(, bye for now, just one more game.

    Feeling tired and restless at the same time. night becomes day, and day becomes night, breakfast starts at lunch time. I'm living in a time and space that belongs to neither past nor future, or maybe both. Laying in the bed with my best friend from college, speak in chinese reminiscene about things happened when we were young. It's hard to believe that six years has passed, we were that innocent, and you start to question whether it is all just a dream or a TV show that I was watching, like the Korean romantic drama I've been watching for the past two days. When memory fails you, then everything all becomes unreal and dream like, doesn't it? Was I really that in love and that heart broken? Was I really that hard working for this worthless degree? Did I really drink that much and get that drunk? Can't remember, don't know, perhaps.

    I'm hiding in this time and space, with my best college friend, away from past, from future and from memories. I'm tired of hiding, but can't motivate myself to move.When tomorrow comes to my door step, would I be ready, for another journey for this comfortable space, and the comfortable company? Time will tell, but at least I have till the sunrise to play,and think.

Saying final goodbyes to people feel like dying and I don't like it.  Feel like i'm being peeled as an onion, it just hurts more and more the closer you get to the final stage, or you get to the people who are closest to your heart. it kept crossing my mind that this might be the last time I see many of them, 6 years is too strong a bond to simply cut off like that. I walked into the check-in counter for my one-way flight, tears dripping off my cheek and I can't stop. I rush into the counter because I can't stop or turn around, because thinking means hurting, sadness is overwhelming.  New life is exciting, but..it's people in the past that made you who you are...saying goodbye to them is like kill part of myself.

   3406 Bradford, an old house built in the 20s. The original windows are now malfunctioning, the bathrooms have seperated showering and bath unit, and there is a tunnel you can dump all your dirty clothes in, which will be collected in a basket in the basement, next to the old-fashion washer and drier. The garage is filled with tree branches,trash cans that wild animals make home with, so the cars are always parked outside.

   There is a cat named Duane living here. He is very muscular and temperamental. He lets you pet him one moment when he feels like it and bites you the next moment when he changes his mind. He used to be an outdoor cat; the notch in his ears tells the fights and trouble he got himself into in the past. So now he settles and retired in this three storied houses with lots of malfunctioned windows.

   Also lives in this house is a computer programmer who used to be a teen genius in the high school he graduated and a friend of mine. I moved into this house for a brief stay of 10days at the end of a long-struggling journey,now I'm having a hard time to leave. Because there is no smell that's better than friends cooking a healthy meal in the kitchen, no music more soothing than the laughter of a fun game party, and no time better spend than with friends and family. Bradford house, a transit stop that reminds me more of home, and now I have a hard time to leave. 

Reading the book "the color purple". It is definitely very interesting. There is woman part of the book, and then the black part of it. I think I like the woman part more. It reminds me of women I've known in the past, in the present, it makes me wonder which woman I am in the book. Am I cellie, am i sofia, am I nettie, am I shug? Interesting characters, interesting approach to a woman's life with all the pressure...

Staying with a couple friends, it is very relaxing. They have tons of books, games, a laidback life style, comfortable living. I want to be like them one day, I want to live comfortably, happily, with a man I love, and kids i make with him...so much for a fantasy.:)